On my drive this morning, the fog was as thick as Pea Soup. I had an extra long drive this morning, because I had to work at a different location today. So instead of a 15 minute drive it was about a 45 minute drive. I was memorized with the fog in the trees. It encompassed everything it touched. In some spots I could barely see a few feet in front of my car. The fog got me thinking.
I have never been one to have been hit hard with depression, but I have felt the tentacle of despondency wrap around my core a few times. The best way I can explain how that feeling of bleakness feels, is watching how the fog surrounds everything in its path. Nothing is untouched by the fog. There are times that you can’t even see what is in front of your nose.
When the fog rolls in, all the light is blocked out. The Sun is just on the other side, but not one ray of sunshine can enter that abyss. Depression latches on with its talons and does not want to let go, and the darkness overtakes. When wading through the darkness, you are a miserable person, I am sure everyone around you can feel the sorrow pouring off you. You want to laugh, but some thing stops the laughter from appearing. At times the density of the vapor is so great that your body feels like it is being crushed, and your lungs can only take in so much oxygen. All you can think about is taking a deep, long breath just to relieve some of the stress, but you are unsuccessful.
I don’t know if you have ever been there. I can’t say I suffer from depression to the point I need medicated, lose sleep, or even have too much sleep. However, I have felt that at times that the world might be better off if the Lord just took me home. Of course, suicide has NEVER crossed my mind. I know people have gotten to that point in their lives, but I believe that my problems would only be worse and my family would suffer greatly. It is a struggle some days to see my own self worth, but I feel that I am overcoming great obstacles.
I feel I am rising above the fog, and beginning to see the light. For the last 18 days my mind has switched 180 degrees. I am on a new path. I am enjoying the scenery on this journey, and I am going to take this adventure to the highest point. I will rise above the fog, and reach that peak of bliss, and contentment.
The one person I can count on when I am down in that murky maze, not knowing which way is up, is my Lord Jesus. He finds me and picks me up and puts me on a straight, clear path. So call on the Lord when you feel that dismal fog rolling in, and he will wrap his big, strong, comforting arms around you. You are His child and He loves you. Here are a few verses that help me, I hope that you can hide them in your heart and use them when you are in need.
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7
“Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up.” Proverbs 12:25
“You, Lord, are my lamp; the Lord turns my darkness into light.” Proverbs 22:29